To much to explain. I lost my house and dignity.. I lost my faith in other things.. I know soon or later I Will be fired.. I am dead weight and need to retire. I had a second surgery on March. Then I moved in July with my bother in law.. NOW I got kick out of there and moving in with my mother in law.. I hope My children stop suffering soon.. I am a poor bastard and want to die.. But, won't commit to it..

I know my kids need more than ever.. It is just a feeling of sadness in me.. I am so depressed and don't know what else to do.. Al because of the idiot that broke me in two... So, I have my third surgery and get better too. I hope everything works better with my mother in law...

I need to focus and try to embrace life to. I hate all of this and no Internet to...Soon , VERY SOON I KNOW EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE!

More suffering =(

Making sure I am still the same. I been throuh another surgery again. Alienated and fearful of death. I swallow pills and forget your face. What was that I was going to yell? The hard choice of walking and breaking myself or the choice walking the right path to suffering and a comeback.
I have been in recovery since March 2008. I have had another chance at life and it's understanding. Angels guard me from demons and my enemies. I fear GOD and love my wife.

I gasp for understanding.. Beyond the river where the devil may lie. I heard the angels say it is almost over and doom is near.. I swear when I lay in my bed trying to sleep. Someone or something is looking at me. Besides that. I still hurt and have lots of pain. I am Stressed, depressed and have anxiety. Sigh.....GOD please I beg of you. I don't want to loose my wife to cancer..In 2 weeks is her test I pray to you to save her...AMEN

Aminda I can and never will get enough of you. I'll be back with more .....adios